Alone

I’d say that with the things I do, about 80% of the time I do them alone.

I wandered around Willow Glen as the Italian Festival was taking place; I knew there would be pasta and gelato so I knew it was a place I had to be. Alone, I walked around looking at the various booths and spent a good deal listening to the live Italian operatic music, which was really lovely.

Maybe it was the crowds of people in their little subgroups or maybe it was the inherently romantic Italian music, but it just donned on me, my loner-esque tendencies. It’s just easier, I feel, to go it alone. And there are many things I enjoy doing that I cannot share with other people because they’re not interested.

It was the first time in a really long time that I felt any semblance of loneliness. And I hate that feeling, the feeling of not being 100% OK by yourself, as if there’s a tiny void that can only be filled by another.